Saturday, August 16, 2008

Two Cheers for Kobe


Although the jury never even went out, we can now concede that Kobe Bryant is, at the very least, an elegant rapist.
For starters, he is leading the American basketballers in just being plain old sports fans, parading with the other athletes and cheering for Michael Phelps, even going so far as to pose with Phelps' mom and to lead the swim team in cheers. (This is a far cry from one of the early Dream Teams, when Hakeem Olajuwon had to elbow Gary Payton on the medal stand to get him to stop his jawing.)
He is also, let's remember, a tri-lingual American [seriously, there can't be more than about 75 tri-lingual Americans in the entire country], giving interviews to the world press in Italian, Spanish and English. (Even better, he refuses to speak French). This is a remarkable skill, and makes Kobe a remarkably well-rounded athlete who can at least attempt to fend off the perception of American insularity and nativism.
There remains, of course, that weekend on the slopes in Aspen. Whatever happened there (he raped her), he certainly forgot the Cassanova creed of leaving his women contented and wanting more. Perhaps Aspen was truly an aberration for an otherwise good guy; to be on the safe side, Kobe, stay away from the wanna-be ski bunnies while in China.

1 comment:

Todd said...

You do that. You go ahead and cheer for Kobe. I'll just sit here and know that he's being Mr Rah-Rah in order to continue to rehab his image as an egotistical me-first rapist. You're letting your patriotic fervor blind you to the fact that Kobe is playing us. Kobe still sucks.